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發表於 10-8-26 13:23 |只看該作者 |正序瀏覽 |打印

以神的方式教養兒女,信聖經是神所默示寫成的基督徒父母請進.......

注意，我想請的是基督徒而已0甘簡單，不是基督教的父母，也不是天主教的父母，更不是乜乜教的父母。
如果閣下不知 “徒”與 “教徒”的分別，不喜勿插喔。

讓我來開個頭分享吧。

創世記 2

23 那人說：這是我骨中的骨，肉中的肉，可以稱他為女人，因為他是從男人身上取出來的。

24 因此，人要離開父母，與妻子連合，二人成為一體。

----------------
如果有62、99、外父、外母不是基督徒的，我認為盡可能不好同住一屋。價值人生觀不同，如果與父母溝通又有困難0既，問題百出。
個人經驗。日後有機會再講。
如果父母要在生活經濟上靠我們的支持而我們又沒有能力分兩頭家，就沒有辦法了。可能神要我們擔當這相處之難處了。籍此機會學習認識人性的弱點了。我們也熬了四年。

[ 本帖最後由 ndw 於 10-8-26 13:49 編輯 ]

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發表於 14-4-26 11:48 |只看該作者

本帖最後由 ndw 於 14-4-26 11:49 編輯

大女兒已經受了浸禮快一年了。去年她受浸時雖然才九歲，但經丈夫與她詳談後知道女兒清楚明白聖經裏道出的受洗的真理。於是丈夫安心給女兒施洗。
今天，一家帶二女兒到車程兩小時遠的兒童醫院看腦癱科專家回來時，在車上看到大女兒坐在正在開車的丈夫旁邊那個位，興致勃勃地提出與丈夫一起唱聖詩。一連唱了許多首。我不知女兒能背出那麼多首聖詩呢。正坐在後座看顧二女兒的我也不落後跟著他們兩父女唱。
真是一副天倫之樂，樂也洋洋之氣氛。
但願我們的細女也會早日信主受洗呢。

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135^#

發表於 14-3-14 12:35 |只看該作者

回覆 appledai 的帖子

My dear sister in the Lord,
You don't need to compare to any one nor look up to any one. We only need to turn our eyes to Jesus. Look at what good job God had prepared for us to do and use all of our might, mind and heart to complete the job. Thus, we may consider we had a good day each night before we go to sleep. Don't worry about the things that we did not have resource to finish of that day because God is already there Tomorrow for us. He will make things work well together for those who loves Him.

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appledai you said very well.thank you 發表於 14-3-14 17:52

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BK Milk勳章

134^#

發表於 14-3-12 14:13 |只看該作者

回覆 ndw 的帖子

I thank you so much indeed. as well as other sisters from baby kingdom. I do get great help from you. You do so much things and still type a lot here. I can not imagine how many hours you sleep a day. Compared with you, I am tiny.
I was lazy and always wanted easy job. Taking care of baby is time consuming and sometimes makes me mad. my mother-in-law could feed my daughter 1.5 hours for a meal. I avoided to do that, would rather to do housework or other work. Now my daughter is difficult and attached to grandma. I made myself difficult.
from last saturday, I almost slept around 5 hours a day. but I believe hardest time will be past very soon. I feel that I started to enjoy parenting when I spent more time with my daughter. I did not enjoy it. and even I did not really enjoy my life which God gave me. God is fair. There is no easy job. He will finally reward us for what we have done.

I did lots of wrong doings when I was young. I am really worth to be dead. Look at others' faith in Him including you. My faith grows too. May God guide me to right way to go.

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133^#

發表於 14-3-11 12:04 |只看該作者

回覆 appledai 的帖子

I can imagine your situation. Indeed, it is tough. Take it one day at a time. Steam Eggs is nutrition and health way to cook food. It is a lot better then eating food from any restaurant. Your daughter get to stay home and stuck with her Mom is also good too. You and her will bond to each other very tied. Many widow brings up one son and the son turned out to be a 孝順仔。So are you, will bring up a 孝順女. Don't be discouraged. This difficulty days will be passed one day. When I was studying in University in America, I have seen and heard many cases like you. We were all foreign students here. We have no parents' help, no in-laws' help, no sibling's help, no relative's help. Usually, University area does not have many Chinese families. For the one who stay in town usually have her own busy life to struggle. So it is so hard for them to provide good, consistent, reliable, and daily resource of helping. I heard a story from my friend. She was talking about her friend. Her friend need to shuffle snow in front of her driveway in order for her to drive her car and go to school when she was in her 9th month of pregnancy. After the baby was born, no 坐月婆，no Chinese food to buy that was good for 坐月。she need to do most of the housework.
One friend of mine was in a little bit better situation, sisters in Christ took turn to deliver food to her home so she did not have to cook.

Even I had my parents live with me for the first 2 girls, they are not reliable at all. When my husband, my children and I need them the most, they insist to go back to Hong Kong for 6 months every year so that they can join all the family and friends reunion activities.

They insisted that they could not wait and I needed borrow money from friends to paid for their trip. That was during the time that my financial situation was not doing good at all. When they came back, they complained every thing about my husband with a long face and dark mood.
I was glad those days are all in the past now. This situation became better day by day since my husband took a big risk to buy a separate living space for my parents to live by themselves. I alone continue financially 100% provide their living. This was happened when my third daughter was just 10 days old. I brought my b a b y with me to sign the closing documents and breast fed her right there in the lawyer's office.
My mom was so mad about me to move her and Dad out. She bursted into my b a b y room when I was breastfeed my b a b y.
She yelled at me: 你話你跟你老公食到乜野？跟他去食屎啦！
Hearing what my Mom said, tear was filling up my eyes pretty quick. My tears dropped on my b a b y's face. My thought was: 媽媽！我情願跟我老公無坐月的好野食，要食屎，我都吾情願與你同住，見你一日對住我老公面黑，這樣不滿，那樣投訴，家日不寧。到處同人講電話呻到我老公形像比實際差到離天百丈遠。
However, I bite my won tongue and did not say any of my thoughts out.

俗語話：好女兩頭瞞，我同父母一起住，想瞞都瞞吾到。吾想瞞既老公做既好事，父母都扭曲來看是壞事。所以我老公情願他做餐蒙既，節省開支都要同我父母分居。
分居後幾年，我父母先至開始懂欣賞我老公。
那時，我們的艱苦日子已經開始上了軌道。依然忙碌，但起碼不會再如當初一樣拿手吾成勢先。
所以姊妹，不要喪志！你總有一天會熬過這段適應中的日子的。

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BK Milk勳章

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發表於 14-3-8 23:45 |只看該作者

The whole day with my daughter. my little always said she wanted to go out to play. I have many things to do and have to stay at home. Even I did not make lunch. I only steamed water egg for her lunch. cried a bit.

She always asked me to play with her. I felt messy and occupied without mother-in-law's help. I did not have much own time. But I get in other side. After made her sleep at night. looked at her lovely face. I felt that I loved her so much. I started to know I paid and I got.

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BK Milk勳章

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發表於 14-3-8 13:51 |只看該作者

回覆 ndw 的帖子

Thank you for your prayer support. I do not have many friends in HK. and not close with in-laws. I am not capable. I have part time job, study, assignments, taking care of my daughter, housework... now have to learn to do things by myself with tears. my daughter has bad tempter. I admit I do not have good tempter either. 99 thinks my bb is good because her mommy is not good.
Today my in-laws moved out, I looked at your post and cried in front of my daughter. She asked me, "mommy, what are you doing?", I said, "mom is not happy. do no make mommy mad. in the future, we need be independent."

I know your guys are doing great. your daughters are compliant. I hope I can be a good mom but I know I have a long way to go. I will pray to God everyday as I need His help to teach my one in godly way.

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SherryandJayden

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發表於 14-3-7 10:25 |只看該作者

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發表於 14-3-7 05:15 |只看該作者

回覆 appledai 的帖子

May God give you wisdom, patience, strength to take care your daughter. He will provide what you need. It may not be what you think you need. I always want more than I need.

I always want to take care of my children, teaching them, doing housework, cooking, grocery shopping, all those full time house wife tasks and don't need to earn money to feed mouths. I think I can enjoy such simple life in this way. Apparently, this is not what God think I need. He put my husband in charge of the household. My husband even said to me that I am not good at manage and doing household work.

My five years old daughter, the youngest one, is the first one grow up without grand parents live in the household.

My husband and I never argue in front of our children not like my parents. We never being upset with each other in front of our children not like my parents. I observed that my youngest one have a better self-control of her temper than the oldest one. I don't know if these 2 facts are related to each other or not.

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BK Milk勳章

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發表於 14-3-6 15:54 |只看該作者

回覆 ndw 的帖子

i am going to live separately with my in-laws after almost 5years living together . i am not good at taking care of young children,cooking,housework...my daughter is very attached to grandma. God, I pray that i can have energy and wisdom to handle all the things. please help me.

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發表於 14-3-6 11:33 |只看該作者

LFCYNWA 發表於 14-3-5 13:43
24 因此，人要離開父母，與妻子連合，二人成為一體 ..

意義重大，照顧，教育小朋友 ...

若經濟和人力資源容許下，上一代又健康，無需要同住來照顧既，緊係同上一代分居好啦。吾單係同男家父母分居，女家都要同父母分居。

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LFCYNWA

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126^#

發表於 14-3-5 13:43 |只看該作者

本帖最後由 LFCYNWA 於 14-3-5 13:55 編輯

24 因此，人要離開父母，與妻子連合，二人成為一體 ..

意義重大，照顧，教育小朋友都只是一個環節

若跟父母住：
－＞丈夫靠老人家的智慧作決定：影響他成為家中的頭，作為家庭領袖的發展
－＞丈夫要自己話事：Override 父親的權柄？還是各顧各？影響他們父子，母子關係。

所以　神有這樣的吩咐。

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125^#

發表於 13-4-24 16:00 |只看該作者

At lunch time, 我和子女在谈吐间有个笑话。
I said: 温柔is like me when I was little. I was a princes brag.

大女惠慈 said: And now Mom, you are queen of interrupter. You have just interrupted me......
When I heard her comment, I was:

This daughter get her Dad's humor.

Her Dad explained to her: Mom did not interrupt you because....

Anyway, this Morning, we were talking about Chinese social culture.
My husband said: Chinese interact in this way..... Is that true?
I said: I don't know because I am a social______
My husband complete my sentence: idiot !

I laugh hard.

Yeah...:;pppp:
I think our children laugh too.
My husband said: You ask for it. (It means that it is hard for him not to give me a kick.)

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124^#

發表於 13-3-3 15:17 |只看該作者

大女溫書事情我唔使煩。唔係佢溫書溫得好。而係我唔急佢學懂如何溫書溫得好。我先培育佢愛神愛人愛讀神的話語聖經著手。而後生活所需的切天父都會加給她的。而我自己首先要搞掂自己的價值觀。我不要以世人的價值觀來看事情排先後重要性，我要以神的國度來看事情排先後重要性。當大女主動和我說她想做快餐店員時，我都會一盤冷水淋落去話：這份工賺唔夠錢我地一家使喔。還是做個律師啦。做律師就要鍛煉好你既記憶力，閱讀理解能力，講解力，語言溝通能力。所以要常溫書，多做練習才可以。
佢聽後首先認同，後來念念下翻來話，媽媽我都係仲意做動物學家，管理動物的工作，我將來叫我個老公去做律師咪得洛。
我呆左一刻

，話：緊係唔好等到結左婚先叫個老公去做律師啦，未必成嘛，你老逗有版你望啦，我夠想佢做律師，建築師咯，而加咪還德享屋企做煮飯佬。你要先揾個愛主既又有志要做律師既弟兄，而後仲要人地又看上你願意娶你喔。你要嫁律師就唔好寒起個背。（我成日提佢唔好寒起個背，今次最有效，佢即刻好有動力敢自己醒唔寒背。）而且佢又願意賺左錢全部畀曬你喔，敢既機會仲微過你自己做律師啦。不如你自己做律師，錢直接入你樹，啊媽我問你拿錢使都容易好多啦。

不過如果啊女話要做傳道人，我就真係唔敢阻止喇。疊埋心水我同老公老來要經濟上自己要搞掂自己喇。

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發表於 13-2-3 15:01 |只看該作者

本帖最後由 ndw 於 13-2-6 02:22 編輯

好感觸(系好感動 thank pyjess)，老公教出這麼乖的孩子。大女今晚主動臨睡前讀書給細妹聽。她倆，有時糖痴豆，有時沒有怨氣的水溝油。

點評

pyjess 你想講"好感動"? 發表於 13-2-4 00:45

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zanezane

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122^#

發表於 13-1-28 14:42 |只看該作者

zanezane 發表於 13-1-18 01:21
你要認識上帝，就得平安，福氣也必臨到你。（伯二十二21）

我的小手工做得7788了, 希望小朋友不用被迫說太多次 Kung Kei Fat Choi.... (我聽這句心裡不舒服, 會想起:人若賺得全世界.... 果句金句.), 佢地可以一路送小手工給親友, 一路說一些較合神心意的祝賀說話.

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ndw 好感動，願意花敢多心機，為的是教養孩同使他走當行的路。發表於 13-1-29 08:25

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zanezane

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121^#

發表於 13-1-28 14:38 |只看該作者

在前晚, 在發燒的我也與老公吵了.
他說新年要回鄉, 我說, 好, 但能否不去祀堂燒香?
老公也不信先人可食香, 不信先人會保祐人. 但他說他會上香.
咁我問他可否和小朋友解釋他的行為? 佢無正面回應.
咁我問, 當奶奶在子女
身邊唸的時候, 我可否同佢地講, 先人不可食香, 先人不會保祐人. 因奶奶用說話影響小朋友, 難到我又不可嗎?
老公話我不尊重別人的信仰. 我說, 我又不是不讓奶奶燒.
老公: 咁我可否去教會, 講道時話耶穌復活係作嘅, .....
我:你可以試下, 一係你就不要去教會, 好似我request我唔去祀堂一樣.
老公: 咁我都可以唔俾阿囡返教會...
跟住阿囡就喊, 話無得返教會....
我: 你可以唔俾, 但天父總有機會接觸佢.
........
我有d心碎的感覺.....
因要處理阿囡的情緒, 入房後自己累得瞓著.

當時老公反問我好多野，好像點prove 神做天地，聖靈感孕，升天..... 我都答唔到。　佢就話我唔清楚又信, 對我的信仰好負面......
但係係咪個個prove清楚哂先信得呢?

天父好好, 佢知我要為佢打杖, 在上星期的家長團契打左底, 令我聽到呢件事.....

"有個80多歲的婆婆, 女兒是忙碌的傳道人(<--傳道人在我阿囡的學校工作), 女兒有時會致電婆婆通話, 為婆婆生活大小代禱.
婆愛從沒有向女兒說她腳有一個雞蛋般大的瘤, 醫生建議她做手術, 婆婆拒絕了. 她也不向家人說, 只是自己向神祈禱. 半年後, 腳上的瘤不見了, 她去醫生那裡覆診, 醫生驚訝地說: 祈禱的確治好你的腳.
經醫生說後, 婆婆才和女兒說. 因佢怕阿囡不信她, 等醫生確定了才說出來!"

婆婆不識字, 未弄清係咪有挪亞方舟, 不用prove耶穌係咪升天, 但因著信, 天父憐憫她, 治好她. 很有意思的真人真事.

信是未曾看見，依然仰望十架，
信是完全交托，深知主已掌權。
我靠著那加給我力量的，凡事都能做，
或風浪或低谷，主平安在我心，
我靠著那加給我力量的，凡事都能做，
行在主的旨意，我凡事都能做。

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